Friday, December 26, 2008

Rosie Rebel's Dream

OK now Rosie has me working nights, videotaping her dreams.
"James. You're not supposed to be here James."
"You know I do my banking here in my dreams, James."
"Give me my check, James."


"All right, James. That's enough, James."

Rosie Rebel's Arabian Xmas

Purty xmas tree-- Horus cat outdid himself this year!
Rosie says nobody ever caught her third eye in a photo before.

Above Rosie is negotiating with an Arabian shopkeeper, totally giving the guy a hard time.

Rosie asked me if I wanted to go for a walk and I said yes.
She took me all around various neighborhoods in Brooklyn
and told me stories about historical events that had happened
in each place. She explained who the statues were of and why.
I'm just finally beginning to get a sense of how the neighborhoods
connect out there again. At one point, I told Rosie how
happy I was to be there with her right then.
She told me I had to find myself a girl that had a personality
like Rosie, but the looks of this other girl she thinks I like.
I don't want anyone that looks like that other girl,
but I do wish Rosie had a sister.
Rosie's boyfriend Phil kindly told me she DOES have a lot of brothers,
in case I wanted to go gay.

Rosie says from now on I should only be involved with women
who have a good relationship with their father OR
who grew up with a lot of brothers and no sisters.
Rosie seems to think she has me figured out,
and I have no reason to doubt her.
Eating Arabian food can make you start to look Arabian

Rosie showed me the place her grandparents lived when
they came back from WWII, then took me to an Arabian restaurant
diagonally across the street from it.
She told me she's always bringing different guys in there,
so the owner probably think she has a million boyfriends.
The waiter came over very happily and asked Rosie if she would be
having her usual. She said yes my good man, and in addition
she ordered for me, and told me we would be sharing everything
in case there was stuff I didn't like.
But I liked everything!
Even the lamb sausage-- isn't lamb the most evil thing to eat?
Isn't that torture food or something?
It was really good though, especially after the long walk.
We also got Turkish coffee, which I hadn't had before
and Rosie taught me about the history of coffee.

It was a really peaceful day.

NEXT: Rosie Rebel Bank Porno!

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Xmas Day


In New York City today, we're having a white Christmas, as you can see above.

Well, okay, it's a white with grey and soot and cigarette butts xmas. But that's the way we like it here! You got a problem with that???!?

Coming Later:
Rosie Rebel's Arabian Xmas

Saturday, December 6, 2008

Cinnabon is drugs

OK I had read that the smell of Cinnamon made people spend more money, and I noticed the prices at Cinnabon seemed over-priced. Today I was cold and stopped in there to get a coffee. She told me I liked it sweet and told me she would make it special for me so I would like it more. I was going to ask for it plain, no milk or sugar, but her offer sounded good. Then I ended up spending $3 on something I shouldn't eat. So I went in there for coffee and ended up spending over $5. The coffee was AMAZING, like nothing I ever tasted before. It had the strangest psychoactive effect. While I sat tehre eating and drinking, the music went from loud angry shouted spanish music to loud post-grunge sung in English then to something that sounded like Andean music. A family sat next to me, telling the girl working there that they would be coming back every day for the rest of the week, which is a strange thing to sit and tell someone working at a fast food place. I never heard anyone say taht in Burger King.

I walked out dizzy and feeling drugged, almost tripping on my feet twice on the way home. When I got inside, Kitka started mewling weirdly and smelling me all over. If I get up and walk, she meows in a high-pitched weird way and runs in circles, extremely excited.

To atone for my sins, on the way home, I stopped at the outdoor food thing and bought 3 pounds of bananas for a dollar-- they have to be eaten in the next day so I'm on an all banana diet again ha.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

stuffing and pumpkin pie

Last night, Michele made me post-Thanksgiving dinner with homemade stuffing! She put in ingredients like mushrooms, it was awesome. Michele is a really good cook, she told me it was a result of having been married. This surprised me because no matter how long my mom was married, she never learned how to cook hahaha. When I grew up, my father would make elaborate meals on Sundays and my mother would boil macaroni and cheese the rest of the week.

Also, Michele was telling me she wanted to make sure I got Thanksgiving dinner. I'm not sure what she meant exactly but it was nice that someone was thinking of me-- sort of bizarre, actually, in a way. During the night, we were discussing other people's motivations-- people we know. Why does so and so do such and such? My guesses were always cynical and involved people having ulterior motives and plans to pull mean tricks. Michele would guess that maybe someone was motivated to do something because they liked me or her. "LIKE?" Doesn't she know that nobody likes ME, haha. Or so I've been told.

Michele and I are both really into the mini-series of documentaries running on Ovation right now about Warhol. She went to art school and has been an admirer of Warhol for years. I actually was never a fan and was pretty uninformed about him (AM pretty uninformed, I should say). I think I saw the Valerie Solanas movie and that was most of what I knew. The new documentaries though go into the Silver Factory period, and I was surprised by how many weird things about Warhol corresponded with weird things in my own life. Warhol is such a god to people that I want it clear I'm not trying to flatter myself comparing myself to him. It was some of the weirder aspects of him that I see relating to my life. He was an artist doing well in painting and advertising, then suddenly one day he decided he was making "films" and therefore he needed "stars." All of a sudden, he's deciding who is a star or not. I had been a cartoonist working in animation then suddenly I was doing public access with Amy Poehler and Jake Fogelnest. Why? I never met Edie Sedgewick but I've known a FEW Edie Sedgewicks, if you catch my drift. It felt like every character in Warhol's "films" corresponded to a character from my own history, haha. Well, except for Taylor Meade. And his "screen test" series of films-- that's my show! In the docs, Mary Woronov or somebody comments that while the rest of them found the screen tests boring, Warhol was fascinated by them. The theory was that he had so few real conversations and made eye contact so infrequently that these films were his one chance to really study a person while conversing with them. That has always been a major function of my show in my life. If you talk to someone on camera, you can study their reactions, you can go back and check it later. I wonder if public access tv had been available to Warhol if he might not have done his "films" as a "tv series" instead.

It got me to thinking about maybe doing things differently. Either maybe I should find a way to make money off of this as Warhol did, or else maybe I should stop having "stars" altogether and go back to just doing projects I can do myself or with Jacques. Because after all, this tv show has gotten me death threats, and Warhol's "film" culture ended up getting him shot by one of the very women he was trying to help!

If I had to guess which of the women I work with might be most likely to shoot me, I would place Michele far down the list. She has one of the most comfortable apartments in the world and two of the best cats-- Romeo and Jubilee. In fact, we shot some catnip footage with the kitties last night. The two of them fight and hiss but after having some catnip, they got all lovey-dovey!!

We also shot a new Carmen Mofongo clip of her explaining how to make Carmen's Coquito, which is the single most delicious alcoholic beverage of all time. Perhaps the most shocking part is that Carmen prefers to NOT use Puerto Rican rum!!! You'll have to wait for the video to come out to learn WHY.

I had gotten there early and was calling people to see if anyone had time to talk to me while I was waiting for Michele, and so I ended up talking on the phone with Checker Phil for a few minutes. He had spent Thanksgiving with the Trachtenburgs and he said Tina kept talking to him about me or something-- it sounded like it was a good thing? not sure haha. I guess it's better to be talked about than not! Anyway, it would be fun I think to have the TBurgs on for a sit down interview with a few interviewers and multiple cameras. Rosie just told me yesterday that in 2 weeks she's off from school so I want to see who is in town in the time Rosie is off. Of course that is the holiday season so it remains to be seen if ANYone will be in town then.

Haha I didn't know that Edie Sedgewick left Warhol to be Bob Dylan's love slave, or that Dylan and Warhol were rivals. People are all crazy. I waste so much time trying to understand everyone's motivations in my life when I should just realize-- people are CRAZY. Don't expect them to make any sense, and then you'll rarely be disappointed in life.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Thanksgiving

One year ago today I was standing on Broadway hugging Lisa while her brother sat in the window of some food place laughing at the two of us.

A year can be a long time.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Me Betraying the White Race


No amount of CIA operatives or psychological torture could prevent me from selling out my own people to help bring about the new Socialist Islamo-Liberal Worldwide Elitist Terrorist State of the Anti-Christ!

I voted for That One on the Working Families party line cuz it sounded more commie pinko. Now all white women by law will have to give up the goods for Snoop Dogg! Death to Whitey!

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Rosie and Rachel and Rosie and Congressman Weiner and Betsy Gotbaum and Jason and Tina and Term Limits




The important part of it is that if you come down to City Hall this Monday morning at 9:30 am, you can hang out with cool people and talk directly to Mayor Bloomberg himself. You can tell him to his face what you think about this term limits idea.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

it's all on, it's Rosie, it's a beautiful day!

Hey it's so beautiful outside this morning, ZERO clouds in the sky!! So nice. I was walking around and walking around, calling friends and getting called back.

Yesterday Michele and I went to see the Trachtenburg Family kids show in Brooklyn, it was really fun and a great show. It's for kids but it was fun for us too. Rosie's "best friend" Phil W. sat with us up in the balcony and we laughed our asses off. Michele and I appreciated the jokes Jason throws in for the grownups, like the reference to the Cincinnati Who concert (when I was in high school I drew my own version of 'Woodstock' from Peanuts that I called 'Cincinnatti Who Concert,' so that joke was extra-funny to me). Rosie Rebel plays two roles, both masterfully of course, and Checker Phil plays himself as both a puppet and as a real Boy Genius. Phil taught the kids how to draw Jack-o-Lanterns. Rosie roller skated down a flight of stairs, I really HATE when she roller skates on stairs, I cringe even when I see it on video, haha. I worry too much. Touching You did a hysterical song about how the kids are destroying the environment coupled with drawings Rachel held up that I actually saw him draw on the set of the TBurg pilot. Tammy Hart and TY sang beautiful backup on Rachel's awesome Pigeons song, and Tammy and Rachel's version of the Gnome sounded sweeter even than the original Pink Floyd version.

Afterward we were talking to the TBurgs a while and just now on the phone Checker Phil told me Rachel told him she got to hang with Carmen Mofongo and wanted to know who brought Carmen Mofongo to the show??? hahaha Phil said Peter did! So I told Michele that, and she will tell Carmen next chance she gets, haha

Anyway now I am going to edit Xanubi and compose the very serious music score for the next ROSIE REBEL INVESTIGATIVE REPORT!!

Oh and I forgot to mention I have a new girl for the show!

A lot has happened and a lot has changed in the last 24 hours. That's sort of becoming more normal for me lately though-- vast change over a short period of time. All of it seems to be for the better. Bad energy situations and people move away from you if you focus on sharing positive energy with people. When you're doing things for the right reason, everything gets lighter. When things feel heavy then I know I'm going in the wrong direction.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Rosie Rebel: SOCIOPATH?

Abigail joins the show


Lisa becomes "the older woman" as she introduces 19-year-old Abigail Jones to the viewers of the 209 Show in Manhattan. Yes, both women are from Ireland but both have different accents!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Is Angel Gonna Hurl On Stage?

Squirrel

This is the kind of blog entry Lisa would call "gay," but it was an excellent occurrence and worth noting.

I decided today instead of eating something healthy for breakfast, I'd have a sticky bun in the park.

I sat on a bench and a hungry squirrel came over and sat next to me.

I gave him some and he ate it on the back of the bench, watching me with one eye.

I gave him a second piece, which he ate, then saved him a larger piece for the end.

The last, largest piece he took and then faced AWAY from me to eat, not watching me at all, just hanging out right next to me and trusting me.

This middle-aged Hispanic couple walked by, the woman talking excitedly about something, looking at the squirrel. As they passed by, the man looked at me with a big smile on his face and translated for me;

"Beautiful," he said, and we smiled at each other because of this squirrel. And this sticky bun.

Potato Famine Funnies

Saturday, October 11, 2008

useless audio

Genius but useless

http://www.peterbernard.com/2am/uselesstakes.mp3

You know when I was waiting to cross Columbus Avenue, a big bus passed that had a painting of a leprechaun on it and it said LEPRECHAUN.

On the back it said it was from upstate, Washington Irving territory.

I told Rosie when she got there, she said OMG the same thing happened to me! The Leprechaun wants us to do this then!!!

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Pigeon Song

I didn't make this video of a new Rachel Trachtenburg song, Lippe did, but yesterday morning Rosie and I were watching this and talking on the phone about it at 8 am and we both love the song AND the video. Was that sentence long enough for you?

Pigeon song

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Sunrise over the Bronx

Oh land of my birth.

Shot from a northern tip of Manhattan this morning.

I've seen the sunrise two days in a row now, which is not normal for me. It's like everything is five hours skewed, like a permanent but welcome jet lag.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Horus Cat vs. Lisa Peters!


When two YouTube stars meet, only one can emerge victorious. PLACE YOUR BETS NOW!

Saturday, September 20, 2008

International Andy Kaufman Interview

ON OUR SHOW SOON:
Rosie Rebel (below) and Lisa Peters in Dublin, Ireland (above)
anchor an international investigative news team interviewing an individual claiming to be the actual Andy Kaufman.
Also armed with questions for "Andy" are Mango in NYC (above)
and Angel Yau in Hollywood (below)
It promises to be a most interesting conversation.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Lisa wins again

Lisa always gets her way.GUEST BLOGGER: Lisa Peters
Hey so this is Lisa Peters from Ireland. :)
Do you remember me? Does it ring a bell somewhere? Somehow?

You might be thinking why the hell is she doing the mailer seen as I'm already back home in Ireland. Well let me exaplin!!

I had been doing some thinking lately. And I was thinking that now seems like a fitting time to put some new material back out on YouTube. Then I remembered how Peter Bernard had helped with the publicity for my videos. And they were pretty successful thankfully. And I realised how I would need the help of Peter again. Hopefully to re create some magic. Peter discovered Amy Poehler, so I know for a fact that he does has a good eye for talent. Peter wanted to work with me from the begining when noone else did. When I was just starting out. Posting (wow the most hidious) videos on youtube ever! lol (Thank god those videos are long gone!!) I have to laugh looking back. But what Im saying is. Peter believed in me when I was a nobody. (I still kinda am.. but we'll bypass that fact! lol) So I would be thankful to Peter as a friend and I would also consider him as one of the best underground publicists and talent discoverers.

So then I asked Peter what would he want in return for him doing the publicity. And guess what... Here I am... Back on the 2amshow. For one final season. To be honest, I did'nt see myself coming back to host another season. I really did'nt. But Im excited about it. And apparently I will be hosting Dublin entertainers ect. So thats kinda cool! I guess things have a funny way of working out in the end! And you really do not know how things will go from one day to the next! Well now me and Peter have another chance to work with each other! So lets keep it coolio!!


EVERYONE REJOICE TO THE NEWS THAT PB IS COOL! lol

Now I am a TV star in New York again, so NO PHOTOS PLEASE!!!

Im eating pizza now at 1am.. my rockstar lifestyle lol and ive college in the morning.. so wow. . I really better head to bed soon!

More from me soon :)
Lisa

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Rosie

Almost every day I wish I had known Rosie Rebel before she got into Columbia University, when she had more time for projects. But backwards retroactive wishes are pointless, I need to be re-educated on magical thinking haha.

I need more women for the show, believe it or not. I think I just need to keep having new women on and see if any of them come back on their own organically. I'd like to have regular people but I also don't want the drama that comes with familiarity breeding contempt and so forth. Also I don't like issuing orders, I like collaborating, and collaboration occurs between peers. Peers also have rivalries and jealousies and ego issues.

That's why I wish I knew Rosie earlier, she doesn't have those issues. And she's the only one that makes fun of me or imitates me that doesn't annoy me. When I get overdramatic or say something stupid, she imitates me and we both laugh. If she weren't so busy we could call it the Rosie Rebel show, I would be fine with that. But she is busy so I'm not going to do that.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Mango Returns

Sexy Mango
Serious Mango
La Vida de Mango

Coming soon to the 2AM Show

"You look like an actor"

I went into Wendy's to get a 99 cent baked potato and was annoyed to discover that the price has gone up to $1.49. I was debating internally whether it was really worth $1.50 to have someone microwave a 20 cent potato when the woman behind the counter started talking to me.

I had to turn down my mp3 player because it didn't sound like she was asking to take my order.

It turned out she was asking me if I was an actor. I said no. She looked at me like she didn't believe me, so I told her I'm too shy to even go on stage. She laughed but still kept eying me sideways.

Maybe she was trying to pick me up. Maybe I should have let her! Hey she has a steady job, she could support me in the style to which I've become accustomed.

Rosie Rebel & I making weird short films to bother you


The Genius That is Rosie Rebel
New comedy video directed by me, written by Rosie

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Phoenix Rising

Anna's Phoenix

I was walking around in the sun just before, listening to mp3's.
The Breeders were singing to me,
"Still the sun shines! The sun shines!!!

We're gonna rise--
feel the light on my face!"
The sun WAS shining and I DID feel the light on my face.
It felt like the first time I'd felt it since I guess 2001 or so.

I'd been saying to my last partner,
just before we split up,
that the time for trying to fit in and be mainstream was over.
This particular ex-partner sings very beautiful but very
middle-of-the-road music.
I told her that with Obama coming in, it's time for artists
to be ARTISTS again-- visionaries and prophets,
not court jesters, "gangstas," bullies or Britney hacks
(not that she was or is any of these things-- she's still my friend).
I told her that I should be working with artists that were
pulling me to be more daring and original,
not someone that was
pulling me toward the mainstream.
I really wasn't very nice about it, but it was a sudden epiphany
and you have no choice but to go with those when they hit you.
My thinking is that right now,
the mainstream is about to become whatever the
coolest artists who get into the media
manage to MAKE it.


There was nothing like Beavis and Butthead in the mainstream
until Beavis and Butthead was in the mainstream in the early 90s.
Before that, Winger was actually popular (sorry, Reb).
In the later 60's, when the Beatles
decided that songs about LSD were
mainstream boy band music, then they were.
Before the Beatles, Pat Boone was a symbol
of the mainstream in music.
There are times of artistic renaissance
where things become sane
for a short period,
and artists get to have a larger say
in what subjects get talked about,
what attitudes are acceptable,
and
ABOVE: Anna Copa Cabanna on location.


Plus for whatever reason, I'm not happy
unless I have a star walking around for me to videotape.

You can friend Anna Copa Cabanna here: http://www.myspace.com/annacopacabanna

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Jacques' latest invention

ABOVE: Me Singing 418 (left) looks at me while I look past her and to the left.
That's just how I talk to chicks, get off my back.

Underground 3D genius Mcasual Jacques has invented new software:
http://www.geocities.com/mcasualjacques/texanim/

Jacques just created a way that you can have 3D animated actors (in a FREE 3D program that ANYBODY can download and learn pretty quickly) act in front of a pre-shot video. In this way, for free, you can have animated characters interact with your live action footage and not have any bluescreen or greenscreen artifacts.

It would look better if I shot my video on high definition as Lisa keeps asking me to make happen, but it works well enough for the internet as is.

Jacques brings big budget tricks to the everyman animator, Jacques is the TRUE Patron Saint of the 3D Artist Underclass.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

MICRO-FACE!

It looks like the early Jim Woodring version of Darth Vader.

Micro-Face stories are in public domain. Does that mean I can publish new Micro-Face stories if I want to?

5ive Dollar Sunglasses

Now I can look at girls without them thinking I want to talk to them!

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Time

1946-1963 = The 50's

1964-1972 = The 60s

1968-1980 = The 70s

Any bad time in your life = The 80s

1992-1994 = The 90s

1995-ON = The Dark Ages

Saturday, June 28, 2008

It isn't name-dropping if you don't mention names

Bizarre story of the week (for me):

The producer of an infamous extreme right-wing national cable television show on a world-famous network told me on the street that his friends all think I'm "brilliant."

"They think you're WEIRD," he elaborated, "but they think you're brilliant."

I wish liberals liked me too! Actually, I wouldn't waste an actual wish on that, come to think of it.

Friday, June 27, 2008

The Dilemma of Distribution

ABOVE: Kyoko a Go-Go voiced by Angel Yau
I've been developing a new series of animated shorts for a while that I intended to put on YouTube, but it's been delayed for various reasons, all related to distribution. I had started a new YT channel for them and put one little intro cartoon on there.
ABOVE: Cherry Cheerleader voiced by Ashly Covington
I remember John Kricfalusi writing something once about how if it has 'toon' in the title, it's probably not a real cartoon. I thought I HAVE to use 'toon' in the title of these because they're actually puppet movies that just sort of look a little like cartoons. It's way more like "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Meets Archie Comics Meets Boody Rogers" than anything else I could compare it to. These are named Cougartoons after one of the characters who hasn't even appeared in a cartoon yet. It'll take a few films before people will be able to really see what the concept is of this series, and I expect the fan base to build slowly at first because of that.
ABOVE: Nerdy McBrain from Cougartoons
I applied for partner status for the Cougartoons channel so that I could put ads on the videos and make a little money off of all the effort. YT never responded to me about it-- they didn't say yes or no, they just never wrote back. I already have other partner channels though, so I figured I should move the new series over to one of them.
Re-enter Me Singing 418, a female Tony Clifton who can actually sing played by Lisa Peters from Ireland, the star of my local TV show. The Me Singing 418 channel on YT IS a partner channel, and we're wasting it with only one cartoon on the entire channel. Me418 is the same age (teenage) and class (rich) as the majority of the characters in Cougartoons, so I figured she goes to their school and she can be in some of the stories, and that should be enough justification for moving Cougartoons to her channel. Lisa's already recorded some new lines for the character and basically my work is now cut out for me.

Charlton Comics Always Sucked

When I was a kid in the 70s, we used to trade comic books a lot.But if you had a Charlton comic book, you were stuck with it-- nobody was going to trade a "real" comic book for a Charlton. Same with Gold Key. Anyway, I've been doing some research and it turns out Charlton had been sucking for decades before I was even born!

Huh??? How come Mighty Mouse has a letter "A" on his chest?
Whaaa--??? Dennis the Menace is a genius now? And where are his Dad's glasses?
WOW. That is the most BLATANT rip-off of Porky Pig I've ever seen. Did these people EVER do anything ORIGINAL???

Ummm... okay, I'm sorry I asked.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Peter Lorre's Birthday

Peter Lorre was great in comedies as well as really sick and dark movies.
Plus, the voice of Ren is John K doing his Peter Lorre impersonation.Peeeetair Loreee! Eeet ees YOU who are our muse!! You, I say! YOU!!

Thanks to The Horrors of It All

I don't twitter or tweet or twellow or twerp

Okay I can't even deal with IMs because of their intrusiveness, there's no way I'm going to freaking PAY MONEY to be part of whatever Twitter is. As far as I can tell, this is a new plot (by the telecoms??) to get people to PAY MONEY to purchase some kind of "device" so they can WILLINGLY PLACE THEMSELVES UNDER PERMANENT SURVEILLANCE. I might be wrong, all I know about Twitter I learned from a Lisa Nova video I turned off in the middle. It was the first time I've abandoned a Lisa Nova video without finishing it, so unnerved was I by the very idea of Twitter.

In the old days, people fought and died for the right to privacy. These days people pay top dollar to LET THE ENTIRE WORLD KNOW WHERE THEY ARE AND WHAT THEY ARE GOING TO DO NEXT. Why doesn't the government just make it cost a lot of money to go to jail? Then all the trendies would willingly pay to go to the hippest designer prison. Then market fashionable, expensive suicide drugs and just do away with the entire consumer culture.

Very Serious Art Theories

If you think cartoons aren't a very deadly serious subject, you will be stunned by the sheer intellectual and existential gravity of Uncle Eddie's Theory Corner, hosted by former Ren and Stimpy/Mighty Mouse animator Eddie Fitzgerald (he also worked on Animaniacs but we'll forgive him). Perhaps nobody since Chuck Jones has been able to speak so seriously about funny cartoons. In fact, it's hard to imagine how a man so adult and mature could possibly make a living creating silly funnies for the kiddies.
If you like your cartoon commentary dry, humorless and severely intellectual, then Uncle Eddie's Theory Corner is the blog for you. Hats off to Uncle Eddie!

Happy Birthday to Marie

Eating Ice Cream

Another try at blogging

This is just a blog for whatever I come across that I think is cool, mixed with whatever I'm working on right now.