Friday, April 30, 2010

The Rampler Explains 209

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Banking with John A. Keel

One day, John Keel brought me with him to this bank. He told me he still banked here because it was the last one he knew of still kept in it's original state. If you can imagine how tall those windows are, well the ceilings inside are even higher. It's the most ridiculous waste of space anywhere left in Manhattan. He taught me about how when banks like this one were built, the people running things wanted us proles to feel secure about our financial institutions, to think of them as solid and eternal. That's why banks were built out of massive blocks of stone and had interiors like St. Patrick's freaking cathedral.These days banks are storefronts which open and close randomly all the time. He said THAT was ALSO a message being sent to us proles by those who make decisions, a change in how they wanted us to view financial institutions.
So we waited in a REALLY long line for a REALLY long time so that Keel could do his banking with a human instead of a machine.
He also never got an email address AFAIK. I kept asking him to, I told him it would make things so much easier. I should have realized that in his mind, making things easier was not a priority.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Peter Bernard's New York

I've begun a new educational series on YouTube called "Peter Bernard's New York." In it, I talk to interesting personalities from around town, and IN THEORY AT LEAST, I'd also do some "solo" episodes where I talk about stories from my own life. None of my stories so far seem as interesting to me as my guests', though, so we'll see about the solo episodes. I don't expect these to get many views in the beginning as I'm sort of coming out of left field with this, but as they begin to pile up, I'll create an index or search engine on my site so that people would be able to browse alphabetically by guest or subject, or search directly for the episodes they want to see. I'm trying to keep them under 5 minutes-ish, and I hope to get to everybody and everything eventually. If you have a good idea about some cool person or establishment or group of people in the City who are doing something which should be made note of, please forward any pertinent info to peter at Thanks!

Above is the premiere episode, featuring Jason Trachtenburg at the 4th Street Food Co-Op. An anti-health food wag described this one on Facebook as "Honey, I Shrunk The Supermarket!"

Above: the first of a series of episodes starring FRANK WOOD, legendary NYC rock show promoter. In this episode, Frank explains how he got even with punk rock star Johnny Thunders!

Above is our second trip to the 4th Street Food Co-Op, this time to talk to the lovely Claire and Dreamriver Press book publisher Theodore Poulis.

Coming Friday: Professor Tom performs Shakespeare AND opera-- all with his clothes on!


After that: Angel Yau! The Rampler a/k/a Frank Edward Nora a/k/a "Ed 209!"
Mr. Creepo! Dino from Laughing Sky! Plus SURPRISE SPECIAL GUESTS!

Haha I'm not hyping this one as much as most of my things, I think it will eventually find it's audience once enough episodes have built up, and I think all the episodes will get decent views EVENTUALLY if not in the short term.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010


Ghost house
Ghost house
Ghost in the window
Unreal, unattainable

Monday, April 12, 2010

I met Joe Franklin!

Frank Wood's friend Professor Tom told me to come to Joe Franklin's office today at 5.
I had never met Mr. Franklin before, but I've watched him since I was a kid.
The Professor was taping his show there and filmed me interviewing Joe for a while, that was fun--
to interview the great interviewer!
But I asked him questions I bet he's answered 4 million times.
He told me he'd always wanted to interview Greta Garbo but she always said no.
I told him that probably my favorite episodes were Bing Crosby and J Geils Band, haha.
I also liked the Nick Zedd one but I don't know if he'd remember that one.
He did remember Tim Beckley, though, when I brought him up in conversation.
Joe says Tim is a very very smart man, a great man.
Then a gentleman in a suit who has a radio show on WPAT came in and Joe asked him if I weren't a great man. So the guy from WPAT agreed, yes. Then we introduced ourselves to each other, haha.
Joe is still fast with the quips and the one-liners.
At one point he appeared to have fallen asleep but when he heard us talking about him being asleep, he favored us with a story about him and Al Jolson!
You don't get to hear too many Al Jolson jokes any more.
He seemed very familiar with modern entertainment, and he told me that Amy Poehler makes $100,000 a week! He insisted this is true, and I would never dare to doubt the great Joe Franklin.

Friday, April 9, 2010


This guy above is named Professor Tom Regan. He is the host of a local TV show called "Be Yourself as Well as Art." Who Art is, I don't know, but he must be a swell guy. Tom is one of the guests on my new little internet TV series set to premiere next week entitled, "Peter Bernard's New York." Haha such an egotistical title. Check out a picture below from Professor Tom's show-- that's the one and only Frank Wood with the REAL Joe Franklin!!! The Professor says he's taking me to meet Mr. Franklin on Monday. If that happens, it would be a real highlight of my life, I've been a Joe Franklin fan since I was a little kid. I used to watch his channel 9 show because it was the only way back then that I knew to see old silent movie comedies. As I grew, I kept watching because he'd always have such a weird and awesome assortment of guests, from the top to the bottom of show business, all sitting on the same panel. He was and is a major influence on me and on all of us. A true living legend of show business-- Joe Franklin.

Saturday, April 3, 2010

The Things You See Whilst Walking Through Nueva York

No I'm not gay, but that's a REALLY funny way to make fun of the Mets' new advertising campaign haha.

Ladies and gentlemen, Harvey the Trickster God, creator of the Universe, and life of the party.

I visited Jason Trachtenburg at the Food Co-Op, he taught me all about edible things I had never heard of. I bought these red fiji somethings, they're supposed to be "super food." And I got curry cashews-- it tasted like Indian food but you can eat it while you're walking around. And umm... bananas, but I had heard of bananas before today (I forget from where). Jason works there 2-4 on Saturdays, if you want to go hang with a celebrity and annoy him while he's working. Jason also plays tomorrow night in Bushwick-- go see his new band, they have a million members!

Speaking of Trachtenburgia, look -- the evil Lord Bloombucks! And it's not even Halloween.

Lou from The Apple Brothers!

Dino from The Laughing Sky!

BUNKY!!!!!!! (no website link for Bunkaloo)


Hey, 1-11 isn't All Saints Day, 11-1 is All Saints Day. Hmmmm... must contain a meaning of cosmic importance...